i digress.

"In loving memory of my grip on sanity..."

The official B(est) N(iggas) B(loggin') roll call:

Teef a.k.a. We All Like Things...™ a.k.a. A Genius : http://www.deathofagenius.com/

Ronnie a.k.a. oNe mAn gAng...®: a.k.a. Mr. Jolla : http://misterjolla.blogspot.com/

Mikey a.k.a. I’m Mikey, I Rock a.k.a. Crack No Rehab : http://cracknorehab.blogspot.com/

And of course, myself.


The Top 6 Songs A Black Man Should Never Bump In Public (Contd.).

Jade. "Don’t Walk Away".

The Incomparable Bozack Jenkins ™: Ahhh yes.. no way in hell was I the only nigga who beat his pre-adolescent dick mercilessly to this video.. the cut off hoodie & boots movement made for a terrific blip in the female nigger timeline.. but if you are a black male in possesion of a functional prostate, be forewarned.. don’t let those hard drums and a bassline custom-designed to clothesline your speakers fool you.. this junt ain’t for you, potna.. tunnel vision is a bitch, but I can’t be the only one to see your gay ass cousin Twan ensnared in its sonic crosshairs.. this song is reserved for 40-year-old white women at war with their second childhood.. this song is for rock solid, 240 lb. diesel niggas who wear thongs, skip in the mall, and clap with their wrists.. this song is for 80’s babies with succulent asses and synthetic scalp modifications.. hell, this song is even for Ru Paul’s unsightly ass.. but you, my nigga? What is "Hell and no" for 300, Alex?

Mr. Jolla: Straight up….the beat is a pure unadulterated SEND-OFF. The beat is funky…but funky in a "where’s the deodorant" type way. It’s not Strong enough for a man, but it’s damn sure PH balanced for a fag though.

To get caught juking to this shit would be Bad News, brown. It’s bad enough to be singing a female’s song in the public eye…you un-tinted window having ass nigga…but THREE? The only times three is good biz is when it’s Kyle Korver shooting a jumper, three model-esque women crave your attention and all look Hollywood hot, and when you buy candy from Walgreens and the sugar product in question is down for the 3 for a dollar deal. Otherwise, stay the fuck away from threes. 6’s, 3rd wheels on going out, and 3 dollar bills…and the vocals attached to the three chickens on this song. Don’t Do It To Yourself.

A Genius: I have a confession. I just put this song on in the background while I was typing this up and during the second chorus I-I-I…hummed a little bit of the song. *hangs head in shame*…I am in no space to talk about this right now…

Crack No Rehab: No cosigning this one, I got my credit to protect here, Jay you are by yourself on loving these broads. I have no idea who Jade is and I don’t really care because chicks in the 80’s and early 90’s were atrocious. Baggy jeans, baggy shirts, black boots and 17 ft weave is not what’s popping. Weave in these broads hairdo’s alone put at least 5 Chinese kids through college. Don’t believe me? Check any music video from that era, nothing but jeans up to their belly button and flannel. A different world being the exception because trust me I would have done the biz-nass to that cartoon character voice having Cree Summer. This song can’t even be remixed to add "girl" to that shit. "Don’t walk away girl" does not make this song less gay and makes you a bitch nigga…nuff said.

Cowboy Troy. "I Play Chicken With The Train".

The Incomparable Bozack Jenkins ™: Got dammit, does affirmative action know no bounds? Some barriers aren’t meant to be broken.. the law of gravity is perfect fine as is, and last time I checked, so was country music.. why? Cuz much like hockey, we’ve swore an unofficial oath to leave that bullshit be.. No niggers allowed? Cool with me! Did this "nigga" miss the memo? I could’ve sworn we all signed the same damn charter.. this is a prime example of ambition gone awry.. could you imagine the look of horror and disgust his parents gave this dude when he came home from Career Day at his elementary school, and told them he wanted to be the first "hick-hop" (his words, not mine) artist? I don’t even blame his parents though, I blame his boys.. what’s this nigga know about hooded tees and Cross Colors? What’s this nigga know about Jason Weaver being the cool nigga on "Thea" we all aspired to be like? What’s this nigga know about drooling over Rachel off BET? This dude is a lost soul and his community collectively failed him..this is like the Pete Rock remix of Jodie Foster in Nell.. he’s better off talkin’ to paint chips and ant hills, cuz when he comes around The Black Delegation, we’re lookin’ at this nigga like, "the fuck does playing chicken with the train even MEAN?".. do not pass Go, do not collect 200 dollars, and leave your skin color at Park Place.. QUICK! Somebody ask this nigga if Cherry and Red are the same flavor of Koolaid!

Mr. Jolla: He’s gonna tell you that Red is technically a color, not a flavor. Let me just say that I’m a fan of all types of music, so those gearing up the "You need to be more open minded" marches….pardon me, the mayor has not signed your Rally Permit. So HOESITDOWN!! Anyway…this traitorous T.R.O.Y. character…what’s to say about him that hasn’t been said about Flavor Flav? He needs to be present at the next Racial Draft so that he can be traded or dropped into the Free Agency Pool…whatever it takes to get him the FUCK off of Team BLACK. Maybe we can rescue D. Wade from Miami in exchange for this nigga and 6 jars of Blue Magic…the Grease. (You know how Riles gets down…) "Hick Hop"? Are you serious? In the video there was a Black dude shown, and he looked out of place as Hell…but somehow at peace with himself. Oh that was this DUMB ASS cracka. The only "Hop" taking place is when the "brothas" make a hop, skip, and a jump over to your "neck o’ da woods" to collectively ensure that there won’t be a "I Play Chicken With The Train" 2008. Let Ruben Studdard sing our apologies….FUCK his straw hat and this bum ass song. You Don’t Want To Be Cowboy Troy….You Want To Live Longer Than Him. Peace To LeBron’s Marketing Team…

A Genius: If this nigga doesn’t die before midnight, I will no longer believe in God. Dead ass. I hate my life for hearing this. I am at my lowest level of swag in 10 years as a result of this bullshit. Yall niggas are talking about flavors and shit…pshh! He’s the type of nigga to say "Kool aid? What’s ’Koolaid’?" We’re taking his black card …MC Hammer lookin ass nigga. Fuck that, I’m not open minded…I hate country music and whatever kind of music this nigga is making too. I swear to the God that I believe in for the next few hours that if I ever see this nigga in person I’m going to punch his zebra ass dead in his mouth. I’m serious as this nigga can’t be. *parental tone* If I ever…I mean EVER catch anybody listening to this shit in the whip I’m lassoing their hoe ass clean out of their window. Cut the bullshit.

SMH @ me knowing exactly what the song title meant soon as a saw it though. I gotta get my black back. I need to go to a rally or something right now… There was a white girl in the video that I would smut crazy though…she could get the business like I left it in my will. You know what’s really fucked up though? This nigga probably think he’s down with the team. NAAAAW. You’ll find out exactly how much of a nigger you are when you jump fool with one of these country white girls. They’ll go straight Spartan on Troy’s dumb ass…300 crackers surround him while black people finally take MLK’s advice and turn the other cheek. We don’t know you fam. There will be no chicken (nigga probably doesn’t like it anyway)…but plenty of train for you. He’ll get tied to the tracks like scarf…Straight Earl Little that ass (R.I.P. Brother Malcolm).

Crack No Rehab: I have never felt the urge to wear a bow tie and sell bean pies but today that all changed. Fuck it I picked up the Quran on sale today and I am officially a militant ass nigga. You know Troy got the most niggerish family though right? I mean uncles hanging out on the porch, no shoes, kids with bright pink lips tap dancing on watermelon. I bet "Issa and skrimp" was a regularly used term in Troy’s household. That’s the only explanation of him beating out Carlton, Wayne Brady, and Taye Diggs for The Wackest Nigga Award. Teef might be in the know but I don’t know what the title means and I’d like to think that makes my swag a little higher. I checked old boy out before when flipping channels and saw a Negro on CMT. Black people are no longer black once they appear on that channel, refer to them as Colored, Coons, Moon Crickets, or any assortment of rarely used words. So for bumping this you automatically get dragged behind a pickup truck.